Diary Of A Quarantined Game Over Employee – Week 2 & 3 – The ‘New Normal’

Day 8:

Today was a very special day for me. It’s not my birthday. No, today I go shopping!

Day 10:

Found a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle this afternoon! Haven’t done one in years. Why do people not do these things anymore?

Day 12:

Rebuilding the coffee table today. Proving pretty difficult as I’m fairly certain a piece of light blue sky is still embedded in one of my knuckles.

Day 13:

Found a page on Instagram filled with Dad jokes! Must have told my girlfriend at least 100 classics!

Day 14:

…Working from the balcony today.

Day 16:

Finding working out from home just isn’t the same as the gym. Figured it out though. Every night when I open my 4th beer, I send myself an email with the subject heading, ‘We haven’t seen you in a while?’

Day 18:

Did an Easter egg hunt this morning! Found 50c, the top of a potato, an old tennis ball and the manual for the fridge!

…Either somebody forgot what weekend it is, or the Easter bunny’s been drinking again.

Day 19:

Sneakily broke wind in the living room today. When my girlfriend asked “Was that you?” I shamelessly blamed the dog. All too quickly she threw in my face, “Darren, we don’t have a dog”.

Day 20:

…Working from the bottom end of the garden today.

Day 21:

Getting slightly concerned about how much I’m drinking. Tonight I got refused entry to my kitchen. Will try again tomorrow.